Da Goddess

…to fall squarely in my way.

I had to drive myself to my physical therapy evaluation. It’s a lot harder than it sounds. Since the seat in the car doesn’t move back and forth, one must twist and turn and contort oneself in order to get in. Guess what I’m not supposed to do? That’s right, no twisting, turning, or contorting of my person. But I managed to get in and get started down the road.

I couldn’t take any pain meds before the big appointment because I had to drive. I can function on Percocet, but driving requires more alertness than mere “functioning” does. So I passed on the pills.

Even though I’d skipped the meds, I do recall sitting at a light, watching the clouds blow quickly across the sky like some demented time-lapse movie. Freaky. Guess I can trip out without the drugs these days.

The appointment itself wasn’t too fun. I had to lie on my back on one of those tables that never seems wide enough when you’re a patient who must log roll themselves on and off such surfaces. And that lying on my back thing? Not so great. It hurt. A LOT. I had to move my feet and legs this way and that for the therapist and endure all manner of sensory testing. I made it through that, although there were tears. Once I was finished, rolling over was an exercise of frustration and I think I came off looking like some weird fish out of water. I think I even saw the therapist trying to suppress a laugh. Oh well.

So, I got done with the therapist and went to schedule my pool therapy. Turns out my appointment for next Monday wasn’t really scheduled even though I’d been told it had. Okay, fine. Next available is on the 18th. Fine, fine. I could only get three pool sessions scheduled right away, the rest have to wait until I’m done with my first session. Oh, and I’m only going twice a week for six weeks.

I finally got out of the building, which had been freaking me out the entire time I was in it. Why? Because that’s the very same building where I’d gone to nursing school. It was like having salt and lime poured onto a wound, rubbed in, and topped with Tabasco. It hurts to think of how hard I worked to get through school and how quickly I was robbed of the career I wanted, got, and loved.

[chill, Goddess, chill]

Stopped off at the pharmacy to pick up my refill and headed back toward home. Now, keep in mind, every time I get in and out of the car, it’s like watching a 6ft tall clown getting in or out of a Fisher-Price school bus. Not pretty. I had to stop at the bank, so I did. Upon returning to the car, I discovered it wouldn’t start for me. I tried and tried and tried. Nothing. I looked at my phone and saw I was perilously close to my battery dying. I called home anyway. I called my dad. I called my friend. Anyone, someone, please! Come get me! Alas, no one could help. Actually, my roommate was the only one home and he couldn’t come help because I had the car.

I decided the best thing to do was to head over to the drug store. Maybe if I let the car rest long enough it would feel better and start up right away when I got back. No such luck. I considered my options and concluded I could just…make…it…over…to…Del…Taco. Not the best choice, but the only one available to me. And that’s what I did. As I walked in, though, I saw a man slumped over in a booth. I hustled up to the counter and asked the gal behind it if the guy was okay. She reassured me he was. “He comes in every day for a cup of coffee or tea and to read the newspaper. He dozes off two pages in. We let him stay here because he obviously needs a safe place to take a little nap.” I knew what she meant. Most people would kick a guy like that out of their establishment, but I thought it was rather sweet that these younger folks let him have his quiet nap.

I sat down to eat my burrito, praying I didn’t regret the purchase in the next five minutes. Everything seemed to be going okay and I took that as a good sign. I kept thinking about the sleeping man. He reminded me of one of my mountain man friends ( photo down). I knew it wasn’t him because he lives up in the high desert. But in my mind I kept thinking, no matter how bad things are for me financially or physically, at least I still have a warm, safe place to sleep each night. I went up to the counter again and I asked one of the young women working if there were some way I could donate $5 toward some food for this guy. “He won’t take it. We’ve tried.” Another gal said, “I’ll put it on a gift card and slip it into his pocket when I go bus tables.” I loved the way she thought! It wasn’t much, but it was something.

Suddenly, I felt a little better. I cleared my mess off the table and headed back across the parking lot toward the car. It had clouded up a lot while I was inside and I prayed it wouldn’t rain on me. The wind had picked up as well. Thankfully it was a tail wind and I had a nice little push in the right direction. I was limping and hunched over a bit, but I was still able to walk. As I was almost to the car, I saw another guy who looked like my mountain man friend. I was convinced that pain was causing me to hallucinate. I kept walking. The guy turned just as I was walking past so that I couldn’t get a good look at his face, but I did catch the words all spelled out in decals on his tailgate. I turned around and said, “Clifford!” He turned to look at me and the slow dawning of recognition came over his face. We stood talking for about ten minutes until his girlfriend came out of the bank. “I leave you out here for a few minutes and you’re already flirting!” she yelled. And then she came and gave me a big hug.

At that point, the roommate called and asked if I got the car started and I said not yet. So Cliff and Debbie walked me over to the car to see if they could help. I got in, turned the key and it started perfectly.

Fucking car.

We all laughed. I called them my lucky charms. We’re going to try to get together this weekend so I can do some portraits of them. Plus I made it home just as the rain began. I barely got wet as I walked to the apartment. It rained harder once I got inside. It’s been raining off and on ever since.

And now, now I must give in to the pain meds. I’ve tried my best to get some photo editing done for a client, but I’ve done all I can do without messing everything up. I can do it later when I wake up.

I guess even though yesterday started off in not the best way, it turned out to be okay after all.

If the car had started, I wouldn’t have run into friends or been able to do something nice for a stranger.

Go figure.

Thank you, God. You always know right when I need a good dose of that sense of humor You have.