2009/03/27

Free Sword Fights!

DaGoddess @ 02:44

Yesterday, after I picked up Little Dude from school, we headed over to Target to get a few items. We had gift cards from Christmas we hadn’t yet used, so it seemed like a good idea.

LD picked out some Legos (surprise, surprise — NOT!), I grabbed some groceries, two new marked down t-shirts, and a few $1 items for a couple of upcoming kid shoots (stickers, little books, that sort of thing), and even though I was far from dressed appropriately (no makeup, t-shirt, bermuda shorts), after running into the same family three or four times (and having a few conversations about kids, parenting, life, etc.), I gave the mom my card and asked her to give me a call sometime so I could photograph her beautiful family. Hey, I did the same thing in the doctor’s office the other day when I met the most adorable two month old and her mommy. It’s a sickness, I tell ya.

Anyhow, so we finished loading the cart with our purchases and walk outside where I see a bunch of high school kids with a table and a sign. One of the boys looks like a young Tom Cruise (for real, like back when he was cute, but wasn’t loony tunes with $cientology yet). The sign at the table is offering “FREE SWORD FIGHTS!” and the young Top-Gunner-look-a-like implores LD to do battle with him in his best Ren Faire King’s English. LD wouldn’t do it. But a little guy, about three years old did and he won!

In the car, I kept pestering my son to go out and take the challenge. He wouldn’t go. I even tried to guilt him into by reminding him of his resolution to try new things this year. He wouldn’t budge. I told him it was good practice for when we actually do go to the Faire this year. Still nothing. Finally, I gave up, but I did talk to him about how I thought it took guts for this high school kid to stand in front of Target and ask people to do this. I mean, at a Faire, you’re surrounded by people in costume just like you are. In a play, there are other people in the play. But standing in front of Target? That takes balls. Shocked that I said “balls”, my child replied, “I have two already, thank you very much, Mom. And are you really supposed to be talking to me like that?” I told him I was the mom and that “balls” wasn’t a bad word. And by the way, the CD we were listening to had more swearing, worse language, than “balls”. He giggled all the way home.

Oh, and before you ask, we were listening to Buck-o-Nine’s Sustain. (I can’t find the post about their CD I’d linked to previously, so you’ll just have to deal.) Do I really let my kid listen to music with foul language? Yup. I’m not saying that flippantly. I mean, I’d much rather have him listen to music that has a few bad words than music that contains lyrics about killing and other forms of violence. LD knows that people swear, he knows quite a few of those words himself, and he also knows that it’s not okay to use them in public, to hurt someone, or to casually throw them around. Our rule is this: if the situation truly calls for an expletive, he must choose the right word and use it in the proper context in the privacy of our home, in front of me…not in front of guests. Take the bogeyman out of the equation and it’s no longer an issue, right? I don’t want him to be one of those rotten little turds we run into all over the place. You know the ones — kids trying to sound grown up or tough and swearing in public, in front of old ladies and small children. My kid won’t be one of them. He can listen to the songs, understand the words, use them in the house only, and I’ll have stripped the words and my son of the power the words have.

I’ve thought this through.

But ANYWAY…back to fake sword fights, pointy slippers, and green wool tights…I mean, free sword fights. I thought that kid had guts and I wish LD had let loose a little and taken the challenge.

Oh well, he’ll get there in time. Self-consciousness is normal at this stage. Someday he’ll be doing something similar. At least, I hope he will.

7 Comments

  1. I have no doubt that when LD gets a little older his balls will have grown to three sizes the Tom Cruise dude’s. You’ve given him that love-of-life base; he just has to grow into it.
    And I agree; it takes a set to do what those kids are doing… I never would have. NOW? Sure, but I’m older and wiser… and it’s the wiser part that counts.

    Comment by Pam — 2009/03/27 @ 05:11

  2. Yes, wiser in that we realize being silly doesn’t normally cause one to shrivel up and die of mortal embarrassment, but that a life without a little folly makes one’s soul shrivel up and die.

    Comment by DaGoddess — 2009/03/27 @ 08:02

  3. I like your philosophy regarding *bad* words. One of my jobs is as a driver for a 13 year old boy. I usually get to his school super early, and thus I get to hear the conversations of all the kids walking by as they get out of class. It’s amazing the language these kids use, not to mention the topics they talk about…and don’t even get me started on the revealing clothes the girls wear.

    Oy!

    It sounds like you have a good handle on this and are keeping you son “grounded.” And I mean “down to earth,” not “in detention.” From what I read here, you’re really being a great parent.

    Comment by DogsDontPurr — 2009/03/27 @ 13:43

  4. Your logic about swearing makes sense to me. Kids are going to hear that language everywhere they go in life. That doesn’t mean they have to talk like that. But it’s there.

    Comment by GW — 2009/03/27 @ 17:59

  5. I hope my approach is sound. I mean, I remember being his age and all the things I was hearing. (That was the first time I heard about BJs and well, a lot of other things)

    I want my kids to know about life, but I’d rather they hear the facts, and the rules(!) from me. Mojo has a set of facts and rules from me and also from her aunt and uncle. LD gets facts and rules from me and from his dad. At least I know what I’ve told them and can feel confident that there’s one initiation packet out there that I endorse, you know?

    Comment by DaGoddess — 2009/03/27 @ 18:13

  6. Look on my sidebar under Favorite Quotes at what Mark Twain said on the matter of swearing. Sums up our (yours and my) feelings precisely.

    Now. I have a question for Little Dude’s mama: Why didn’t YOU take the sword fight challenge? :wave:

    Comment by Cheri @ Blog This Mom! — 2009/03/29 @ 22:02

  7. Because I’m still healing. I expend energy on the more important things (and getting in and out of the car often taxes me beyond my limits — comfortwise)

    Comment by DaGoddess — 2009/03/30 @ 03:49

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