PROMPTuesday #31: Faking It
This PROMPTuesday, write a story about someone faking a skill to gain the attention of someone else, which only forces him/her into a situation where s/he must use this skill in order to save him/herself from a bigger threat. Include: a cast-iron lamp and two nuns giggling in the corner.
The Rock said you could instead write about a superhero with a completely random and ridiculous superpower, like William H. Macy in Mystery Men (otherwise known as “The Shoveler,” who had the special ability to use a shovel with dizzying skill).
Mine. Kinda dumb I know, but I don’t write well with time pressure, and somehow it ended up not being about faking it. Except of course, that I’m no writer, so really, I’m the one faking it…
“You’re a what?”
“A Lamp Lighter. Gas, oil, electric, desk, street, any lamp, I can light it.”
“What if the bulb is out or it’s not plugged in or something?”
“Doesn’t matter. I can light anything.”
“That’s kind of a weird superpower to have, isn’t it?”
“It kind of runs in the family.”
“Here try this one. Those nuns over there in the corner brought it in.”
“Odd looking lamp. Never seen anything like it.”
“Yeah. Careful, that cast iron is a little heavy.”
“There.”
“Jeez that’s bright! Turn it down!”
“Can’t.”
“Then turn it off! What are you trying to do, blind me?”
“Can’t turn it off either. I’m only a Lamp Lighter.”
“Then let me toss something over it to save my retinas.”
“Sorry about that, I should have warned you.”
“Why can’t you turn it off?”
“I think my Mom dropped me on my head when I was a baby.”
“Right. Don’t ever come in here and light anything again.”
“Yeah, I know. Everybody always says that.”
“Good. Now leave. And tell those nuns to stop giggling on your way out.”
Jan/CascadeExposures
Jan, that was hysterical! Great job. What do you mean, you’re no writer??
Loved your PROMPT!
Comment by San Diego Momma — November 20, 2008 @ 9:52 am
Thanks
I think my goofiness quotient was a little high this morning…
Comment by Jan — November 20, 2008 @ 9:54 am
Jan: Loved it-supports the old addage “Be careful what you wish for”. P.S. Your photography is spectacular.
Comment by bob — November 20, 2008 @ 2:02 pm
Thanks, Bob!
Comment by Jan — November 20, 2008 @ 2:13 pm
Coulda fooled me. I thought it was clever, Jan!
Comment by GW — November 22, 2008 @ 12:04 am
That is hilarious - very well done. Wonderfully goofy and a totally useless superpower - “Let there be light! ‘e sez, and blimey mate - you could see for bl**dy miles!”
Comment by The Gray Monk — November 22, 2008 @ 1:45 am
Thanks, GW!
I love your addition, GM, the accent come through perfectly!
Comment by jan — November 22, 2008 @ 1:48 pm