TJH Inspire: Horny Mike and His Helmets

Da Goddess @ 03:27

In an effort to distract myself momentarily from the dreaded sinus crud that’s invaded our home, here are some photos from last year’s trip to Vegas. We stopped at Count’s Kustoms and had a look around. Ran into Horny Mike as he was moving in a display of his helmet work. Pretty cool stuff.

Horny Mike Pinhead helmet work

Horny Mike

Horny Mike Helmet

My favorite is Pinhead. Striking as all get out.


I Never Needed To…

Da Goddess @ 04:45

While I was in Vegas, I didn’t gamble. I never felt the need. People couldn’t understand it. Well, here is the reason:

Family Slot Machine

This is the slot machine my dad brought home when I was 5 years old. The first night it was in the house (in the basement, specifically), they had to bring my dinner down to me because I kept playing. And winning. So I ate in the basement. Hot dogs. With ketchup. I remember it like it was yesterday.

Once you’ve played a slot machine for hours and hours over the years, it becomes apparent that The House always wins. Sure, you might have a lucky streak, but you just never know when that streak will end. So I never bothered to play while I was in Vegas.

Pretty machine, eh?


Because I’m a Mousekedoer

Da Goddess @ 23:38

Unless you are subjected to countless hours of preschool programming, that title may not make sense. Just know that I’m DOING SOMETHING.




Da Goddess @ 01:35

Just a few photos from last weekend. KISS Night at Vamp’d to benefit IMAGINE Foundation (to keep music education in the schools). KISS Experience took the stage halfway through the night and blew our minds!

I’m going to break these photos up into two posts so it’s not so “Arrrrrgggghhhhhh!!!!” and in your face. Sound good?

Just a hard luck woman watchin KISS Experience in Vegas

KISS Experience

Detroit Rock City on KISS Night

God Gave Rock n Roll To You KISS Night

KISS Experience

KISS Night in Vegas

Monsters of Rock KISS Experience

KISS Me, the First Sequel

Da Goddess @ 01:33

Part II

God of Thunder on KISS Night in Las Vegas

I Wanna Rock n Roll All Night on KISS Night

KISS Experience on KISS Night

KISS Night in Vegas

KISS Night Aug 25

KISS Night in Vegas


Protected: Things I Desperately Want to Say

Da Goddess @ 23:59

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Whistling Dunny

Da Goddess @ 16:33

I don’t get out much anymore. What I mean is that my job keeps me busy and leaves me only one day off each week. I get up and get to work early, usually getting done with everything about 14hrs later. For my efforts, I am paid a pittance, but I have a roof over my head and a bit of food on the table. It is what it is and I mostly really like what I’m doing, so it’s okay.

When I do get out? Well, let me tell you! I go to some of the most interesting places. Like the park. The grocery store. Occasionally I also go to the $1 movies (everything that’s just about to hit on DVD). By the way, when I go to the movies? They actually cost $1.50. Close enough, right? Sometimes I get to see a show (courtesy of friends who work there and comp me tickets). Other times I’ll go sit in a Starbucks and chat with friends. Doesn’t really matter much as long as I’m out of the house.

Yesterday was a special day, though. I got to go to Round Table Pizza. Years ago, I worked for RT. For three years. I ate pizza morning, noon, and night. And was skinny as hell. Their pizza rules! So, yesterday my friend and I decided to go there for lunch. BEST. DECISION. EVER. I had three slices of pizza. Two cups of Pepsi. A little bleu cheese dressing (it’s an old RT 15 minute break trick…plus their bleu cheese rocks). I was stuffed, but super happy. Except…

The bathrooms at this place were terrible. Sewage smell. Always nice, amiright? But the best part…what really made the entire experience something to remember was the sound the toilet made when you flushed: it whistled! Not just a low sound. No. It was a full-on high-pitched whistle!

Now, you tell me: as a woman, it’s always nice to get a little whistle, isn’t it? Especially when you’re in a bathroom stall with your pants half pulled up.


My Week’s Been One Fun-Filled Adventure After Another

Da Goddess @ 02:10

I have been puked on twice this week. First time was H2T (and in case you don’t comprendez Tyraspeak: “Head to [2] Toe” — and yes, I realize I watch way too much ANTM. It’s a guilty pleasure.)

So there I was, feeding an adorable little baby boy his bottle when ALL OF A SUDDEN HE ERUPTS! Gooey, mucousy, yellow and white vomit is pouring forth. I’ve been hit. Shoulder. Breast. Waist. The thigh! The shin! And the feet. Both of the feet. He’s covered with the goo, too. And crying. Okay, SCREAMING. I throw a blanket over the vomit on the floor and head upstairs to clean us up a bit before his mom gets home. In fact, I text her to let her know what’s going on since she’s been gone for over four hours (most of her outings turn into Gilligan’s Island pleasure cruises…heading out for a gallon of milk suddenly becomes a quest for the Holy Grail and my plans get shot to shit). Up the stairs with the wiggly, screaming, very unhappy baby, and the little guy to boot…I grab clothes for him, clothes for me, set him on the bathroom floor, grab wipes, washcloths, and a towel. I strip him down and get him cleaned up, dried off, and hand him a book. He calms down and looks at the book while I strip down, wash up, and get dressed. I have to do the washing bit a couple of times because I can still smell puke on my skin.

As many of you may recall, I don’t like vomit. Emesis is my nemesis.

And I’ve endured this twice in one week.

Also, I’ve had a repeat MRI. Finally. It’s been two years since the last one and I’m having increased symptoms of hand numbness and tingling in the morning, patches of tingling and heat in my legs, and even with meds the pain is not well-controlled (of course, having the insurance company play games and dangle the meds in front of me for three weeks before giving them to me was rather contra-indicated on my pain management plan, but I eventually got them). Now we can see if things have shifted/deteriorated/compressed or whatever else to the point of my needing surgery again, or at the very least having a reason for the insurance co to approve more steroid epidurals…which had been working!!!! Sometimes the simplest solutions require squeaking wheels (or overly dramatic tearful phone calls to lawyers) to get the game playing to stop and get people to do what a judge ordered them to do two years ago.

It’s no wonder I’ve begun to intermittently bite my nails again.

Late yesterday, after my MRI, after the barfing baby and his mommy left for an exotic land, and the daddy left for work, I found myself reveling in the deliciously pure silence in the house, knowing I wouldn’t have to wake up early for two weeks unless I so choose, knowing that my laundry can be done when I want to do it, how I like to do it, and knowing that after the daddy leaves to join the mommy and baby, I will have even more freedom to just rest and relax my way…all day…all night…watching whatever I want. Not having to visit with Caillou or Sportacus or even that cute little imp called Elmo. No. I will listen to grown up music. I will watch grown up tv shows. And I will eat grown up food WHEN I WANT TO!

Sadly, I will have no one to take a mid-day nap alongside me.

Applications are welcome. Up-chuckers need not apply.


Proof That We Exist

Da Goddess @ 22:36

Just thought I’d share a photo taken a few hours ago at Outdoor World (Bass Pro Shop…place is freakin’ huge and just up the street). Please note my hair: graying at the temples and, yet, I don’t care. I’m just happy to be with my boy. See? I’m smiling! But I’ll be all frowny in just a few hours.

with LD in Vegas

LD goes home tomorrow.

I’m gonna miss him.



Da Goddess @ 01:13

I have a kid suffering terribly from boreditism and don’t know what to do. He’s stuck here at the house while I nanny…no little hikes or explorations like we used to do in the past. We have movies. He has the computer. We have some games. But there’s just not enough to do for an active 15 year old who should be out roaming and running wild.

I feel horrible that I don’t have the time off to take him out to do the things we’ve done in the past. Yet, I’m glad he’s here and we have the time to talk and catch up. Like last night. I got done a bit early and he was ready to go to bed (out of sheer ennui) and then I asked him about his airsoft league. We got into a whole discussion about various guns and other gear. And we also discussed the lack of ROTC at his high school. Weird that his district doesn’t have ROTC at all. He wants to go to a school where that’s an option…he’s very decided on the military. I admire his determination.

We have had a few laughs. Mostly, it’s been me watching this lovely young man who has grown so much in the past ten months. I find myself admiring his gentleness with the baby, his kindness to others, his respect to all, and his outgoingness when meeting new people – especially those who should be intimidating because of money or fame…and yet my kid just jumps in there and charms them. Makes me realize I’ve done a few things right, as has his dad, over the years.

So, what should I do with him during the bulk of the day while I’m nannying? Hulp! I need answers.


Ta Da!

Da Goddess @ 14:01

Yep, I’m back! Aren’t you glad? Or is there anyone still out there?

Anyhow, I have internet again and am happy. Currently sitting next to a sleeping baby while (Not So) Little Dude is downstairs playing a computer game.

LD and I have packed a lot in since he arrived Saturday evening. We’ve (in semi-order of occurrence):

  • He met a reigning king
  • Gone to Denny’s
  • Gone to Walmart for groceries
  • Come back to the house
  • Been silly (oh wait, that happens all the time)
  • Watched a movie
  • Played with a baby
  • Gone to the park
  • Been sword fighting
  • Gone to TGIFriday’s (where he admired our pretty waitress…I picked that restaurant specifically because of her)
  • Saw Human Nature (his 5th time, my, um, almost 40th time)
  • Saw a current Miss United States
  • Went to a rock club
  • Hung out with cool musicians
  • He met a tv star
  • …and even though he’s only had breakfast twice, his current bowl of cereal total stands at 6 (I should’ve bought a bigger bag of cereal)

I have missed this boy so much! He’s so freaking smart and funny and sweet. On top of all that, he’s just a plain ol’ good kid. I’m a proud mommy. The only thing that would make me happier is to have Mojo here, too.

Ahh, having my son here is like having a warm hug all the time.


PROMPTuesday #172: Laundry List

Da Goddess @ 09:08

Tis PrompTuesday over at San Diego Momma’s place. Been a long time since I’ve played along, but heck, my post was written in her comments section. I’m just spreading the love.

You know how such complicated things are really quite simple? Like, you want to work out? WORK OUT (San Diego Momma). Or, you want to write a book? WRITE A BOOK (San Diego Momma). Or maybe you’ve been meaning to reclaim your soul from social media saturation. STOP TWEETING SO MUCH AND WRITE YOUR BOOK (San Diego Momma). So for today’s writing prompt, I’d love you to laundry list something that sounds complicated, such as…

Oh, go read her entry. It’s good.

“As for YOU, laundry list something. And…Please post your submission in the comments OR post in your blog and leave a link to your blog in the comments.”

I’m a great lister, so here’s mine:

How to survive in Las Vegas:

  1. Find a sugardaddy.
    1a.  Be under 25
    1b.  Be HOT
  2. Work at any of the big casinos as a service “model”
    2a.  Again, be under 25
    2b.  And, naturally, be hot
  3. Failing the first two suggestions, try gambling. Because there’s no RISK OF LOSING EVERYTHING. Ever. Not at all.
  4. Take a job in an industry that’s oversaturated by people who don’t know what they’re doing and charge too little, thus fucking it up for those of us who are good and charge for being educated and competent.
  5. Hope you have enough friends with empty sofas so you can couch surf your way through life as you wait for meaningful work.
  6. Be prepared to piss off at least two of those friends (over something small, but still piss-off-able).
  7. Be prepared to beg and plead for forgiveness endlessly if they are the kind of friends you like having in your life.
  8. When all else fails, become a live-in nanny for first time parents who are sweet as can be and make you life as comfortable and happy as possible. No lie. They’re that good.
And that’s my laundry list, which will also include doing plenty of laundry in the days to come.


Scorpions, A Very Bad Blogger, and The Job

Da Goddess @ 10:03

I was punished for my blog absence but good. Walked into my friend’s house last night and stumbled upon my first live and not encaged scorpion (and tiny baby scorpion to boot).

Actually, I wasn’t really punished as much as I was surprised and angry because she can NOT have scorpions running about in her home. So I stuck a glass on top of it until she got home. It then took two of us to get it scooped up into an airtight container.

Look, I’ll rescue and relocate rattlers. I will kiss tarantulas. But I draw the line at scorpions. Especially ones dropping babies as we’re trying to avoid getting stung.

Blah blah blah.

The really BIG news of the moment is that I have a new job as a full-time, live-in nanny for a sweet family and their beautiful little boy. I am very excited about this. Over the moon, in fact.

Also, happily, a lump at the edge of my breast/armpit area has decided to go away after ten days. I’m considering that VERY GOOD NEWS.

Oh, then there’s the upcoming PBS special for the group Human Nature next month. Please watch it. I am in the audience (yes, I am…was there both nights). Better still, it’s going to be amazing! You will love these guys as much as I do.

And with that, I should tell you that DaGoddess.com is back, what with being rescued by Jay and Pam. (Thank you, mi amigos!)

 This post marks my return here and, hopefully, better blogging habits.

Other special thanks go out to people whose names I cannot mention for things I cannot mention. They know who and why and how deep my gratitude pool is.


Photos for Teeth Donations

DaGoddess @ 01:13

Wow, been attempting this for a while and my phone keeps erasing stuff. Yep, doing this from the phone. Typoes and odd letter combos be damned.

Currently lying in bed with ice pack to jaw, vicodin on board.

Okay, so here’s how photos for donations works;

You choose image from anything you’ve seen on the blog (please include link to post and brief description if more than one image is posted) or from flickr.com/photos/laughingrhino and you’ll include the file number from flickr (usually with “img” in there on the description section, as well as a description of image in the note section on PayPal.

$10 gets you 5×7 digi file

$20 gets you 8×10 file

$50 gets you 11×14 (or two 8×10) and 5×7

100-up will get you 16×20 (or two 11×14, or four 8×10) and two 5×7

all files do not have to be of same image. mix and match. also, because your are receiving digital files, you’ll need to hang on to the email that gives permission for you to print, along with printing recommendations for the best color and overall results.

When you get to Paypal, simply enter dagoddess (at) gmail dot com (as you would a normal email address), make your donation, and don’t forget file numbers and sizes for each image.

Thanks for your support! My teeth and I thank you.

Once Upon a Monday

DaGoddess @ 00:24

I started explaining how my teeth began crumbling in my mouth in the comments of the last post and figured I’d share the whole insane story here, where more of you could join in the uneasy laughter and occasional cringing.

So, here we go. It all started on Monday. I was before dawn to go shoot with my friend MOBT. We do the nude shoots together. He decided he needed more breast work with me and I agreed. It’s been a year since we’ve worked together and I thought it would be good to catch up with him.

Off to the arroyo we went. We were going to shoot, then he was going to buy me breakfast, and then we were going to hit a second location.

The arroyo is a cool place. I took LD there last year and we wandered around, exploring. I was fascinated by the way the light bounced between the fine powdered pale walls that had been etched by water and wind. T and I figured the ligh would be good for our early morning shoot. The time of day meant we wouldn’t be risking heat exhaustion since it was low 80s at 6am. We arrived just as the sun started to hit the tips of the highest walls. Perfection.

I got undressed (leaving my shoes on – such a lovely look) and we walked back into one niche that looked promising. I sat down and posed, know exactly what T wanted until he was inspired to try something else (one of the benefits of working with the same person repeatedly). Click click turn lift your head let your hair hang over your face click click head up go back to eyes closed click click. And the I changed position. I had my feet up on a ledge and was leaning back, comfy in my little nest when T said he wanted me sittingup more. I checked the area, as I always do before place my bare feet or bare anything anywhere and started getting into position OH HOLY SHIT OUCH MOTHER FUCKER OUCH! Invisible prickly thingies appeared from under the powdery dirt, firmly attache to the sole of my left foot. I tried to extract one but couldn’t get the right angle.

T to the rescue! I rolled onto my side and extended my foot to him, where he began the lengthy, delicate removal process. “I don’t want to accidentally leave something in your foot.” Nice having a detail-oriented former Army Ranger on hand for such things. He got every last little sucker out of my foot and we returned to our shoot, none the worse for wear.

We move to a couple other locations and got some more shots in, but then he and I both started feeling dizzy and kind of out of it. We packed up and I got dressed, and off we went, hiking back to the car.

Now, all the walking I’ve been doing has paid off. I no longer lag behind, huffing and puffing. Except for some reason, I kept having to stop to take a drink of my water. And to deal with dizziness. And some nausea that was creeping up on me. T was kind of in the same boat, minus the nausea. I kept smelling paint
fumes, like heavy duty, industrial kind of paint fumes. T doesn’t smell it at first, but then he does. He’s ready to get the hell outta Dodge just as much as I am.

We get to the car, settle in, and are off to breakfast. As we get almost to our exit, I beg him to pull over – quickly – and barely make it out of the car before I start heaving my guts out. All that’s there is water and bile (I’ve really really not been eating much lately – like something small every two days, thanks to Cymbalta). I repeat ths a few times and feel better. So we’re off to Denny’s. Bacon awaits me! Except itdoesn’t. Tried some cranberry juice, doesn’t taste good. Bring on the ice water. I suck that up like a camel refilling its tank. End up not ordering food since I’vehad to go vomit again. I do, however, say I’ll try some of T’s toast. I never get around to it as there is more barfng to be done.
After he finishes, I wrap the toast up, planning to nibble at it later. We stop at a store and I load up on gatorade (wrong flavor) and a bottle of lemon lime soda…all $1 each. Finally get home, shower off all the dirt, notice my foot (of the prickly attack) is swollen and discolored, get dressed, make ice pack, elevate foot, settle down to rest after some wrong-flavored gatorade, doze off for a few hours.

I awaken parched, achey, a little dizzy, slightly woozy, but my foot looks much better and I feel like eating something. I got after the toast. Manage to eat all of it. A good sign. I work on more gatorade and water, letting my stomach adjust. Finally, I decide something soft and bland might go down well. I make mashed potatoes and throw in the lastlittl bit of cheddar I had. They’re good!

And then it happened: crunch. WTF? I kinda spit out what’s in my mouth, think maybe it was some pepper or something until the next bite: crunch. Now it hits me. Just like last time, except this is three teeth! FUCK! I don’t need this now. Can’t afford it now. I don’t have the time or patienc or money or even the mental strength to deal with it. But one cannot live with crumbling teeth that will only lead to bigger, costlier problems.

Thus I spent yesterday looking for a dentist, even hit up the dental school. The least expensive option was $2800 and that includes the antibiotics I have to take becauseof a little heart murmur. Now I just gotta raise it.

I got $100 coming in on Saturday and God only knows where the rest will come from. If you want to help, I’d appreciate every penny. Paypal work – dagoddess (at) gmail dot com is all you need to make a donation. I’m willing to offer digital downloads of any of my images to donors. details to follow

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