May your heart be full of joy, love, and gratitude today and always.
Thank you for your friendship and love!
Friends are like bras; a good one never lets you down
May your heart be full of joy, love, and gratitude today and always.
Thank you for your friendship and love!
Sometimes I wonder if those who cite the Bible/religion as their basis for hating on or denying the rights of homosexuals and/or transgender individuals ever considered the idea that God made these people and put them here on earth with us to help us open our minds and hearts.
Substitute homosexual/transgender with black/Hispanic/Asian or any other ethnicity and the depth of that type of prejudice becomes even more ridiculous, doesn’t it?
I truly believe we are all here for a reason and we should be more open to others before we become so isolated that we’ve walled ourselves into individual compounds and the entirety of the human race dies off.
Just something I was thinking about.
Rob was the sort of man who got under your skin and migrated to your heart, kind of like a thorn or a parasite. And I mean that in the best way possible. Basically, once you made contact with him there was no way you were going to shake him.
TEN YEARS. Ten whole years he’s been gone. It continues to feel as though he might still call or email, as if there’s another story he needs to tell. I don’t know if that’ll ever really go away.
There are far too few people in this world like him and the loss of just one such person reveals the special place we hold in our hearts for them. I, thankfully, live with and love such a character. But the space where Rob lived will never truly be filled by anyone else. And I’m okay with that. Special friends deserve special places forever.
I. Fucking. Did. It.
I’ve made it to 50! And the last 14 of those years included blogging. Crazy, isn’t it?
This past year’s been a rough one. Frustration, pain, and heartache seemed to be around every corner. My own health issues, my family’s health issues, deaths of friends and my sweet Celia, and having to say goodbye to Mojo as she packed up for Alaska. But this is all part of life and we get through it, don’t we?
So I’ve survived and am grateful for making it this far. Of course, I wish things were easier, but without sadness I’d never appreciate happiness; without pain I’d never appreciate pleasure. It’s all part of life. LIFE. I’m still here! I almost feel like hunting down that vice principal and a few friends’ parents just to say, “you were WRONG!”
Heavy sigh, deep breath, and many prayers I get to try writing another post like this next year!
Rob would’ve been 64 today. It’s a little odd that I know this, that I still keep track. But I miss him. Really, really miss him.
There are hundreds of things happening I wish I could talk about with him. People I want to introduce to him and him to them. People I know would enjoy his humor, his music, his Robness. And I know he’d enjoy them. First and foremost, I know he and King Arthur would get on like a house afire.
64. How has it been 10 years already? Why does this day continue to hold significance for me? The thing is, even if I DIDN’T think about it, I’d still know it was his birthday.
I’m not sure how I’ll handle the birthdays of other friends who have died this past year, but I’m pretty sure it’ll be just as rough and bring memories flooding back. I know it happens on Mikey’s birthday. This time, though, I’m adding four more friends to the list (2015 was a very rough year deathwise).
So, here’s what I’m going to do…I’m going to have a day of remembering a dear, funny friend who meant the world to me. I’ll celebrate the laughter and the absolutely indelible impression he left on me, and I will take that approach with all the others. That’s all I can do.
Happy birthday, Acidman. We still miss you.
Sunday morning began with a phone call I couldn’t have anticipated in a hundred years. My friend Becca had just died. Becca. BECCA! No way! No. Just. NO!
Her boyfriend told me she’d been admitted to the hospital on Friday with a(nother?) broken leg. Or perhaps her previous break had problems. He saw her on Saturday. Sunday morning, her aunt calls to say she died. How does this happen? Why?
I have four sent texts saved on my phone. One was to her and her son after faire this past spring. It read #pickle. If you knew her son, you’d be laughing your ass off right now. He’s a special young man. Aspergers. Just becoming a teen. And now his rock, his only light is gone. I’m crying for him, his loss, and the fact that his mom is gone from us. Each and every time I think of B, I cry because everything she did she did for him.
All of us are stunned by this news. It’s not right. It’s…it’s so wrong in so many ways.
This makes two friends I’ve lost this summer. Both amazing women. Both some of the most incredible spirits I’ve ever encountered. Our little corner at faire is now going to be their corner. Forever their corner.
Becca, my friend, please know we’re missing you and we’ll do whatever we can to help your boy. We love you!
Several days ago I got a call. It was a call I did not want to receive. And yet, it happened anyway.
My friend, JBJ, passed away. She’d been battling cancer for a long while, but it was the kind of cancer that could be treated and conquered. Then, it wasn’t. The doctors had found caner in her lungs. The terminal kind. She wasn’t home long after that diagnosis before she lost her fight.
It hurts. It hurts me to think of the pain she was in, the hopes she had, the children she loved so much, and how much her presence will be missed in the community at large. She was one of those people. You know, the kind who light up a room the minute they walk in. The kind who make you feel you are the luckiest person in the world to know them. The kind who give so generously of themselves and make the world a better place.
And now we must go on without her.
JBJ, we miss you. We promise to never let your boys flounder in your absence. We promise to be the kind of people you always believed us to be. And we will always hold you in hearts with love and respect. Rest well. You deserve it, honey.
It’s been a fairly shitty couple of weeks around here.
We said goodbye to my darling Mojo and have been dealing with her absence, fretting about the drive. She arrived in Alaska safely and we all breathed a sigh of relief.
I ended up in the emergency department twice in one day for my back. Spent much of the next six days fighting back tears because I hurt so damn bad 24/7.I’m only now getting to a semi-comfortable place.
Then I get word that a friend’s cancer has spread and gone from survivable to inoperable and terminal. That was after finding out two other friends are battling cancer, too. It’s heavy on the heart, y’know?
Celia had to be rushed to the vet on Thursday as she had stopped eating, drinking, using the litterbox, and went into hiding. Her ears had bubbled up, as had part of her nose and a paw. Luckily, we found a new vet who said it was likely a food allergy, treated her with steroids and antibiotics (secondary infection from open wounds), and sent her home with us. Once home, we closed off the rest of the house so we could get to her and, lo and behold! She ate. And she started acting like our little princess again.
Of course, all that was manageable…and then I get The Call. My sister called to say my mom was in the hospital after having what they thought was a stroke. Now they say it was likely a T.I.A. or two. Her left arm, hand, leg, and foot are weak and she’s complaining that there’s some weakness on the right as well. At this point, I simply lifted my eyes to the heavens and begged for all her pain and infirmaty to become mine. I don’t care that she’s 80! My mom deserves better.
And now here I sit…praying like there’s no tomorrow.
If there’s another shoe or two? No, thanks. I have plenty. Besides, my feet have been swelling.
So, the 16th marked my 13th year of blogging and it was followed by my 49th birthday. I survived both with my usual “ehness”.
Mixed in with that was a party for my Mojo who left Monday for the wilds of Fairbanks, Alaska. Yep, my little girl is off to join her husband at his current post. It’s both wonderful and sad; bittersweet. Which is also how I feel about everything else.
While blogging has mostly been a joy, there have some very sad times. The loss of friends like Rob, Mikey, and Scott has left a major void in the blogosphere. Thankfully, there are still many amazing friends out there and I’d hate to start naming them and miss anyone. Let’s just say y’all know who you are and I am so very grateful you’re a part of my life.
As for being 49, there are times I consider it a freakin’ miracle I’ve made it this far. When I was younger, I certainly did my best to push the limits and short my chances of having a long life. All that changed when Mojo came along. Kids’ll do that. I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Now, those of you who’ve stuck around this long, THANK YOU! And those who’ve decided I’m not their cup of tea, well, I’m pretty sure we’re both better off because of it.
Here’s to making it to Years 14 & 50! Hope you’ll be there when the time comes.
“Picture this: Sicily, 1934…” oh how I miss Sophia Petrillo!
Anyhow, imagine a nice, normal day at ren faire. Enjoying the weather and the people, the music and the madness. Then pictue Peasant Bowling. Yep! We had Peasants lined up as the pins. It was the goofiest thing I have ever seen and…done. it was a lot of fun. I’m hoping I’ll get a chance to see it again so I can bring my camera. I only wish I had video capability on the cam so you could all enjoy the thrill of it all.
Survived the day and did my best to keep the back in line. Exhausted now and I am heading to bed. Perhaps sleep will find me. Perhaps I will dream about the new royal baby, Princess Petunia Periwinkle Perth Amboy. She’s absolute perfection.
From our home to yours, from our family to yours, may this time of celebration be full of love, joy, and giving with an open heart. May all you give and receive be cherished always.
For King Arthur and I, we’ve spent the past week quietly picking up small gifts for family, lounging around in anticipation of the drive we’ll have later. Monday, Mojo came up to spend some time with me. She brought a project along: baking little Christmas tree cakes and then decorating them. It was heaps of fun and it was delightful to spend time with my girl. Sadly, we did not get together with KA’s grandkids for cooking baking this year. They were such amazing help last year; I could have used their help again this time around. Never fear, we’ll find time in the future to do some baking. I adore them and sharing a family tradition with them is good times for all. Even without them, I managed to make four batches of fudge, two batches of sugar cookies, and two batches of gingerbread cookies.
Also, since Fletch and Celia never spent a Christmas outside of a shelter until now, we’ve been introducing them to the joys of tissue paper pouncing and shredding. Fletch has taken to it like a champ! Celia’s eyeballed it, yet remained wary. She’s back on antibiotics at the moment and is none too pleased with me for giving her the meds. Such is life with cats.
On my Christmas wish list: one day…just ONE day of walking out of the house not covered in fur; one day off from litterbox duty; more lap time; more cuddle time; and healthy kitties from now on.
I hope your holidays are warm and exciting!
Here are a couple of friends from faire. These ladies are in the guild next to ours. The purple blouse? I gave that to L. I could never get the chestal region to fit quite right so I passed it along and L made it work. I love when that happens!
The internet connection at the timeshare is about the slowest damn thing I’ve ever experienced. I’ve had dial up connections that were faster!
But that’s neither here nor there. I wanted to tell you about my slow stroll around faire. And I mean…s.l.o.w. I took my meds before we went and felt okay when we arrived, but it wasn’t long before I could feel my left shoulder lock up and my right leg lock up. The left leg was really hurting, too, but it didn’t freeze up on me like the right side did. No, the left side felt like broken glass being ground against every raw nerve possible. We made it most of the way around the faire before I said anything about the pain (I count that as a big WIN!) and when we finally stopped, I realized I’d left my pain meds in my camera bag back at our friends’ guild camp. D’oh!
A slow walk back to their camp later, I got my meds and we sat around talking with our friends, met some new people, and basically rested. By the time we were ready to leave, I was feeling a lot better. It didn’t take too long before everything began to hurt though. Got back to the timeshare, took my meds, and settled in to watch some TV.
King Arthur fell asleep early and I’ve been trying to edit photos and write this post. It really has taken a very long time to get this written and posted. Oh well. It’s done.
Oh! At faire, there was the most gorgeous dragonfly hanging out at our friends’ camp! And I got photos of it! Woo hoo! I haven’t uploaded those photos yet, but they’re on the camera just waiting and I promise I’ll get to them this week. Really and truly.
Well, I’m going to hit publish now and see how long it takes for it to happen. Fingers crossed!
King Arthur brought us out to Vegas for ren faire this weekend. We won’t be going until tomorrow afternoon, but we’ve managed to have fun even still. Last night we went to see Human Nature (thanks to my friend who is in the band), went for dinner afterwards, and then threw a couple games of darts.
KA got to meet another one of my dearest friends and they hit it off well. I love when that happens! I credit Big B with saving my life when he encouraged me to move out here years ago. For those who remember, my living situation before the move was horrible and I didn’t see any way out of the whole sordid mess. Once I moved, life got better. So Big B is one of those very special people to me, just like KA. That they met and liked each other? HUUUUUUUGE! It’s a very big deal to me.
Also spent the better part of this afternoon in a meeting at the time share KA owns. Couple hours doing that isn’t so bad when you end up getting to stay somewhere nice for basically nothing. The property is very nice and the people are accommodating (yes, it is their job, but when it’s genuine, it’s even lovelier). So, after that meeting, we came back to the room and have settled in for the evening. I’m wiped out. Yesterday’s drive wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t exactly great for the old back and it’s left me a bit exhausted. Now it’s off to early bed for me. Maybe. Probably. Could happen. Who knows?
Hope you’re having a great weekend!